I think it might help if I let you know that the REASON I had started thinking about the idea of racial identity so much recently. It is because of how individuals (and yes, there have been a number of them) have been reacting to the fact that my fiance is white.
To be quite honest, I was surprised in this day and age that anyone cared. I was also surprised that even though it was obvious that I wasn't bothered about his race (obvious because I am marrying him), people were sufficiently opinionated/agitated/whatever it may be about his race to make remarks and to talk about it to me and him and to others whether or not we were present.
I would agree strongly with a lot of the reaction to my former post that race should not be a instant part of someone's personality. But, personally, I do not see it as a visual label, it's actually a genetic label which can be identified through our DNA. We don't choose our race and yet we are judged for it. It doesn't make sense in any application, which is why I've been working to remove it from my interactions with others.
I would challenge people (particularly those who do have an instant mistrust of people who are white) to interact with him, not as the anomaly (the "oh he's not a typical white guy" label he's gotten in the past) or as the norm, just as a person. Why is that so difficult? Why MUST we label? Who cares... and if you do, don't bother bringing it up to me because you'll just end up with an earful.
So that's my own little rant. Thanks to those of you who have been responding to the post via facebook.